I experimented with this $12 gadget that is an Amazon Alternative. I stay disturbed


Chris Matyszczyk/ZDNET

A ton of peculiar items have occurred in excess of the very last week, and I don’t just mean in Congress.

So I was diligently stepping as a result of the 7 days, hoping not to say the wrong detail to the completely wrong man or woman — or, frankly, to the correct person — when I espied a gadget that appeared to defy initial belief.

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I haven’t experienced any hair for a pretty a prolonged time. Additional precisely, any hair that could be described as significant.

When I did have hair, a single of my greater delights was to venture to the hairdresser.

There is certainly a little something entirely uplifting about owning the identical individual lower your hair each, say, two months. (Yes, my hair actually grew very a lot in my hairy days.)

But perhaps the most beautiful minute at the hairdresser’s was when just one was first invited to the backward sink, just to have one’s hair washed.

If you’ve ever experienced anybody clean your hair, you can know what a delight this is. If they know you very well enough that, by means of the shampoo, they therapeutic massage your head as well, then you’ll realize the meaning of heightened remaining.

I’d long forgotten that experience. Right up until, that is, I took a erroneous flip on Amazon and learned this: The USAGA Head Massager Scalp Massager 20 Fingers Head Scratcher for Head Overall body Soothing.

My very first considered was to speculate why the United States Beginner Golfing Affiliation could make 1 of these matters. (It doesn’t.)

My second assumed was: I like the considered of my head system stress-free.

And my top considered: 20 fingers massaging my scalp? That sounds great.

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Just before I’d even go through the rest of the product description, I might fully commited $11.99.

Then I did read the item description. In which there was this: “USAGA 20 prongs scalp massager offers you much more touches and relaxing [sic]. Excellent for men and women with stress and anxiety and rest issues.”

There was also this: “Just gradually go back and forward scalp massager on your scalp, neck, and shoulders, you will feel uncover [sic] new different practical experience. A good Present for your sweetheart, family members and good friends.”

more Technically Incorrect

It arrived in a incredibly wonderful box. This was no ordinary scalp massager. This was, claimed the box, a “Premium Scalp Massager.”

I removed the massager carefully, respecting its premium top quality, and uncovered it seems to be like a kitchen area gadget. A peculiar whisk, perhaps.

Instantly, nevertheless, I experienced to try it. I positioned it higher than my head and then enable it carefully slide down my scalp. And again up yet again.

It’s entirely correct to say that I felt (and discovered) a new, various working experience. It was akin to possessing a peculiarly abrasive whisk rub up and down my head.

It was akin to remaining an more on a film set in England, circa 1457. You are off to war. You have to wear a metallic helmet. Try out this on for dimensions.

It still left crimson marks on my head, which fortunately pale.

But how did it truly really feel? Nothing like owning your scalp massaged by another human becoming. Very little, in truth, that was remotely enjoyable.

Or maybe I will not have the proper form of head-primarily based nerve-endings to enjoy the new, distinct knowledge. This scalp massager enjoys an just about five-star score. It can be an Amazon Choice, which allegedly indicates lots of people today like it. Most likely it also implies Jeff Bezos swears by it.

It even will come with a further gadget in the box. An elongatable detail with a cupped conclude-component that appears to be like it may possibly be a backscratcher.

Or just one of these points that retrieves golfing balls from lakes.


Chris Matyszczyk/ZDNET

The USAGA Head Massager Scalp Massager is, therefore, a highly absorbing device, appreciated by people today of unimaginable nerve-endings, sensitivity and high quality top quality consciousness.

I aspire to sign up for that elevated neighborhood a person working day.